Yes, people really believe Barack Obama is orchestrating a grand conspiracy to hide the illegality of his election. They are called birthers. They know deep in their guts that Obama is un-american; therefore, he must be unconstitutional. Somehow. They just need to find a way.

All Obama has is a document certified by the State of Hawaii saying he was born in Honolulu. See the picture above. WTF? That’s all he’s got? What in the world was he thinking running for President?

AMG’s policy page states that people shouldn’t post conspiracy theories. Apparently, the idea that President Obama is an illegal alien is not a conspiracy theory. The idea that Obama is an interstellar alien must actually count as a conspiracy theory because I haven’t seen that thread yet.

The thread that began back in July entitled The story that refuses to go away, Is Obama a US citizen? is the most recent birther orgy. It starts when “wv_republican” posts a link to a story about Orly Taitz’s lawsuit on behalf of a reservist contesting his deployment to Iraq. The lawsuit was based on the claim that Obama doesn’t have the authority to order anyone to Iraq because he isn’t really Commander-In-Chief. Of course, the reservist probably had no trouble cashing any U.S. Government paychecks leading up to his deployment. Fucker. But now that he is being sent to Iraq, he gets all concerned.

Anyways, the lawsuit died rather quickly because the military cancelled the orders for this particular “soldier.” I guess the military doesn’t like to give crazies guns and send them to foreign countries. Who’d a thunk it?  But that wasn’t immediately obvious to the AMG birther Queen/moderator Michelle Anderson who, upon hearing the news that the orders had been cancelled wrote:

So the White House now finds it easier to rescind the Major’s orders than to produce the birth certificate? Interesting…

Interesting?  Let’s think about this logically. In Michelle’s mind, the President of the United States of America is a socialist illegal alien usurper.  She thinks that this is only interesting? What the hell? This story about the reservist is either a sign pointing towards the illegitimacy of the American President or it isn’t. Time to balls up, Michelle, because if you really think that the President isn’t really the President you should be out there screaming it everyday. Hearing that your 3rd cousin twice removed was just won a local ultimate frisbee tournament is “interesting.” Finding out that the leader of the free world is really the leader of a Kenyan coup d’etat is not interesting, it is absolutely the most important story of the last, I don’t know, 250 years?

But these people don’t go all out. They say a few things on message boards, sure, but they generally just go about their lives. They may be nuts, but they don’t want others to know they’re nuts. So they tone it down.

After a whole page of “gee gollies” back and forth, the Editor adds his wisdom:

To the extent that the Obama birth certificate story is a dog chasing its own tail – it’s useless, pointless. Now, when/if someone comes forward with new, credible evidence that moves the story forward – great. In other words, the day some reporter produces Obama’s official birth certificate proving he is not a natural-born US citizen – great. Until then? Speculating is, to some, a way to kill time. But it doesn’t interest me.

Wow, what a brave stance on the truth, Editor.  Let me summarize what you should have said:

Hi, this is The Editor, and I wanted to make a comment on this whole Obama birth certificate thing. It is utter bullshit. If you believe there is even a chance Obama was not born in Honolulu, you need your head examined. Therefore, I am closing this thread permanently and banning anyone that tries to bring it up again. Oh, and Michelle, check your inbox because you’ve got a little message from me. Actually, don’t bother checking because I’ll tell you right here. You’re fired. I don’t need moderators that can’t separate reality from a conspiracy-theorist circle-jerk. Best of luck on your next paranoid endeavor.


I mean, seriously, the Editor is almost encouraging more posts. Saying “when/if” someone comes out with “new” credible evidence doesn’t mean anything to these people. They think what they’ve already posted is credible, so the next thing will be credible too. It’s a really low bar. You’ve got to put a foot down and call a fruitcake theory what it is.

To his partial credit, The Editor does eventually close the thread down. Not because it is wrong, mind you, but because only one person continues to show consistent interest. The Editor says in his remarks:

It is a topic, as I’ve written before on AMG, that someone should either vow to resolve or, failing that, let the topic alone.

Yes, if only there were some way to resolve this topic. Like actually reading the birth certificate Obama posted online. Or listening to the State of Hawaii.

By the way, Scott Fish/The Editor is now part of Republican Steve Abbott’s “new media” team. I know Scott isn’t a full-out birther, but even being open to the possibility that Obama isn’t a citizen is far too close for my tastes. Could we get a Republican campaign that is 100% crazy-free? Please?

Oh, and guess who else is a birther. Our friend Traci Gauthier, candidate for State Senate in Lincoln-Orono. She posted this link that includes the line, “Kenyan-born US Senate hopeful, Barrack Obama, appeared set to take over the Illinois Senate seat after his main rival, Jack Ryan, dropped out….”

Wow. First of all, Traci shows her absolute 100% full-blown idiocy by presenting an internet link as some sort of evidence that the President wasn’t born where he said he was. Second, notice they misspelled Barack. If you’re going to choose random links to show that the President is a traitor, at least try to find one that spells the President’s name right, for Christ’s sake. With her kind of critical reading skills, I’m surprised Traci isn’t setting her sights a little higher than State Senate. You’re going places, kid, don’t sell yourself short.

Birthers and AMG: Like fish and water.

P.S. – Birther attorney Orly Taitz was, thankfully, fined $20,000 for her idiocy last year, showing that there is some justice in this world.

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