A Homicidal Maniac lives in Derry, Maine with his wife and two children.
Now that the snow is melting and it is becoming harder to follow people tracks, I’ve finally got a little time to get behind the ol’ keyboard and pound out a few words to the wise.
A lot of people think that people huntin’ is about action. It ain’t. There is a lot of time spent lying in wait, cleaning firearms, and sharpening machetes. That leaves a man with a lot of time to think. And what I’ve been thinking about is ol’ Tom C and his posts about liberals getting all pissed off and shooting people.
I’ve got to say, Tom, I respectfully disagree. I’ve spent a good bit of my time killing liberals. They don’t usually put up much of a fight. I’ve seen turtles in heat with more spunk than that bunch of code pink, flower-child, spawn of Adlai Stephenson types. If one of them ever had the nerve to shoot back, why, you could bet your snowmobile I’d be blushing like a lady’s slipper.
So all in all I think you’re misreading things, Tom. This ain’t liberals killing people. This is mad people disease.
You’ve all heard of mad cow disease? Well, we people hunters got to watch out for the mad people disease. If you take out some guy and he was actin’ all wobbly, talking about the guv-mint taking away all his rights but no one else is catching on, then you’ve pretty likely got a mad person on your hands.
The trouble with mad people disease is that it spreads like wildfire. Used to be, once upon a time, that a mad person would never have a chance to infect the rest of the herd. Nowadays the internet acts like a carrier, bringing the infection from one part of the world to another. Some mad person thinks up a cockamamie idea up in New Canada and before you know it the mad people are saying the same thing down near Rumford. All they need is a dial-up connection, a computer, and sometimes an odd radio station. Boy the times sure are a-changin’.
So Tom, don’t be giving those liberals more credit than credit is due. They ain’t shooting up things and crashing planes. Gosh, welfare is real generous these days but not quite enough to afford an airplane. Let’s keep this conversation safely on the ground and just say that mad people do mad things. It ain’t about politics.
It shouldn’t be that everything is about politics. Some things just is. That’s my wise words for today, kids. See you around.
Well, hopefully not, if you want to live.