John Frary is at it again. Here is my rewritten, short version of his love letter to Paul LePage in the Kennebec Journal.
Hi. Are you mad at me? Good. I like it when people are mad at me. Let me try to do it some more.
Paul LePage is a really awesome Governor. Did you know he had a sparsely decorated office at Marden’s, so of course he would be an excellent Governor? It just makes sense.
I absolutely adore Paul LePage. He is the coolest guy ever.
Paul LePage has read the constitution. And the Federalist papers. But all of you morons out there still hate him because he doesn’t read gay little art books. Clearly nothing about his actual words or actions plays any part in your irrational hatred of him, because you’re just a bunch of stupid little twerps with bookshelves full of gay-ass little art books and maybe even some faggy poetry.
Paul LePage adopted a guy from Jamaica. How many Jamaicans have you jackasses adopted? I thought so.
Man, that Paul LePage is sure swell.
Oh, there was some real news last week about some guy resigning or something. I don’t know anything about that.